That Don't Impress Me Much
by keep-me-posted
Summary: Fishlegs goes to Hiccup and Astrid for advice on how to impress Ruffnut.  HTTYD OneShot.


**Lo and behold! I bring you my first [but hopefully not my last] Fishlegs/Ruffnut OneShot! Looks long, but it's not really, 'cuz this stories got a lot of dialog. More humor than fluff. My last Ruff story didn't turn out so great, but maybe that was 'cuz it was a Ruff/Lout story? I personally think Ruffnut and Fishlegs are so much cuter together, lol. Anyways, I hope it's an overall good story, 'cuz it took me forever to write, lol. And I hope it's funny. I was basically aiming for laughs, lol. All mistakes are mine, as the heat is making my head all muddled. Thanks for reading!**

**Nope, still don't own How to Train Your Dragon. :P**

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"Hey guys!" Fishlegs called, as soon as he entered the blacksmith shop. If you ever needed to talk to him, Hiccup was commonly found working there. You'd also find Astrid and Toothless there, who were even more commonly, always at his side.

"Hi," Astrid waved over at her friend. Hiccup just continued banging a random piece of metal with a hammer. Annoyed, his girlfriend nudged him with her elbow.

He gave a gesture that was assumed to be a wave. "Yeah, hi, Snotlout. I told you, I'll let you borrow a hammer as soon as you tell me why-" The young blacksmith glanced up. "Oh, hey, Fishlegs!" He paused. "Uhm, books are in the back, but I'm pretty sure you've read 'em all." He gave a grin before returning to his work.

"Actually, I came to ask you something," Fish started, twiddling his fingers nervously.

"Well, as you can see, I'm sorta busy with something else right now," Hiccup said, tapping the hammer against the hot steel once more. Astrid gave him a death glare.

"But I'm willing to help in any way that I can," He quickly added.

"Okay," Fishlegs breathed, trying to think how to start.

Astrid raised an eyebrow. "What's up?"

"It's...about a girl."

She brought a hand up to cover her mouth, holding a chuckle in place. "And you came to _Hiccup_ for help?"

He merely shrugged. "Well, he got you, didn't he?"

Hiccup's eyes shot open and darted back and forth between his friend and girlfriend; a look of horror on his face. Astrid then casually walked up to the large teen viking.

"Hiccup didn't "get me", okay? I don't _belong_ to anyone. Besides, if anything, _I _got _him_," She said, poking at his chest, with every other word she spoke.

Sweating a little, Fishlegs tried to rephrase his last statement. "What I meant was, Hiccup is the logical choice to come talk to, because he's got a girlfriend; namely you. I mean, you're together, right?"

Astrid's features softened a bit. "Right." She sat back down and Fishlegs let out a breath he'd been unknowingly holding.

Hiccup chuckled quietly. "So, who's the girl?"

Letting her inner girl slip out just a smidgen, Astrid hugged her legs to her chest and let her chin rest atop her knees. "Ooh, is it that cute little viking you bumped into at lunch the other day?"

"Actually," Fishlegs started, rubbing the back of his neck. "It's...Ruffnut."

The couple just a ways in front of him blinked in unison.

"Really?"

"Er...yes."

"But you're both so...different."

"I know, but-"

"No, she's right," Hiccup said, picking up his hammer he'd recently set down. "Really different."

"Like..." Astrid pondered. "You like to read and Ruff...doesn't."

"Or," The young smith smirked. "She likes to hurt you and...you're not so keen on getting hurt."

"I know!" Fishlegs shouted. "Look, I don't know how it happened, but it did. I like Ruffnut. Like really, _really_ like her." He paused. "But then, no one ever thought you two would last, but look at you now!"

Hiccup stopped banging for a moment and gave a slight shrug.

"I mean, Astrid used to hate your guts," Fishlegs continued. "She'd always have something nasty to say when you weren't around."

"Ouch," Hiccup said, holding his chest in mock-pain. He didn't really care. After all, it was all in the past.

Noticing this, Astrid joined in. "Well, could you blame me? He's not exactly what you'd call viking material. Just look at him!" She gestured her hands to the boy still at her side.

Again, Hiccup took a pause to his work and Astrid smirked. "Alright, from now on, the only burning allowed is by the forge. And the dragons, of course."

Toothless, barely paying attention to the conversation perked up at that.

"When necessary!" His owner quickly added, holding his hands in front of him.

Giving a "you're no fun" look, the black dragon went back to his nap.

"Relax, Hiccup," The girl viking stood up, kissing her boyfriend's cheek lightly. "I love you, _now_."

He rolled his eyes in return, but it was obvious he was blushing.

Fishlegs turned from the current seen in front of him and sighed, kicking at the dust below his feet. "Aw, who am I kidding. Ruffnut will never like me. She's...too smart and pretty and...amazing." He seemed to drift farther away with every adjective he spoke.

Hiccup stared. "Uhm...are we still talking about Ruff?"

Astrid punched his arm, causing him to drop his hammer onto the floor.

"Ow, Astrid!" He grumbled, bringing his hand to his bruise. "What did I tell you about hitting me while I'm working?"

"Well," She crossed her arms over her chest. "Stop saying things that give me the perfect opportunity to."

"Guys!" The larger of the teens waved his hands in the air. "Please help me. How can I get Ruff to like me? Or at least notice me."

Hiccup distinctively rubbed at his upper arm again and grinned. "You can always take her for a romantic flight on a dragon, like I did."

"Whoa, easy Romeo," Astrid said. "I only agreed to that because you kidnapped me and dropped me on a tree."

Fishlegs eyes widened. He'd never heard that part of the story before.

"Besides," The girl continued. "You had a Night Fury. Fish's got a Gronckle. Horrorcow can barely manage to lift herself off the ground, let alone two teen viking's on her back." She quickly glanced over at the dragon's owner. "No offense."

"None taken."

Starting up the ideas, again; Hiccup spoke up. "You could give her a compliment."

Fishlegs shook his head. "Tried that yesterday. If I recall correctly, she responded to it by...grabbing my arm and dragging me forward, until I crashed head on into one of the hall's wooden beams." He seemed to be smiling. "It was impressive. I was out cold for two hours."

Dipping a hot piece of metal into a bucket of cool water, Hiccup mouthed the word "wow" to himself.

"Okay, so maybe you could start with something simpler," Astrid suggested. "Like...a smile."

He shook his head again. "No, I tried that just _before_ I was knocked out." He raised his arm. "That's what got me this dragon-shaped bruising."

"Omigosh," The girl viking laughed. "It really does look like a dragon! How'd she do that?"

"I don't know," Fishlegs shrugged, letting his arm fall. "But I think she's been practicing. I saw Tuffnut sporting a similar mark on his face earlier."

Hiccup, clearly having enough with this conversation, poked his finger at the cooling metal. "Look, Fish, if you want to get Ruffnut's attention, all you gotta do is-"

Before he had a chance to finish, an axe flew right over the apprentice's head-just barely grazing the top of it-and landed deep within a wall far behind him.

"Missed," Another girl's voice cackled outside. "Is that the best you got, frog breath?" Ruffnut then appeared in the doorway and walked forward, over to her axe that was now buried deeply in the back wall.

Fishlegs froze.

"Hey guys!" She waved her over at her friends currently staring her down. Barely noticing them, she made it to the weapon and wrapped her hands around the handle of it, pulling with all her might. "Hmm, not bad," She mumbled; then, quickly whisking around, added, "And don't you dare tell Tuff I said that."

Hiccup shook his head and landed his focus on Fishlegs, who was still standing in the same spot. With his hands still busy with his weaponry, the brunette gestured over at Ruffnut-still yanking at the walled axe-with just his head.

Fishlegs eyes went wide and he furiously shook his head.

His friend's look went stern. "Go," He lipped.

Breathing in and out, the nervous viking ran over to the still struggling teen, tripping over a few things in the process.

Once he was in front of her, he opened his dry mouth. "You know," Fishlegs spoke, clearing his throat. Ruffnut looked at his blankly, as if she hadn't even noticed he was there. "If you pull at it with just the right leverage..." He placed his hands cautiously at the blank spaces of the axe's handle that weren't currently occupied with her hands. "It should come right-" They pulled together, popping the weapon out of its current hole. "Off."

When he removed his hands from the handle, his fingers slightly brushed against hers. He blushed furiously, hoping she wouldn't notice. Then his sweaty palms juggled the instrument and shoved it lightly at Ruff.

The girl twin looked down at the axe now in her hands and up at Fishlegs. She gave a lop-sided grin. "Thanks."

"What's taking you so long?" Tuffnut called from the outside. "Are you lost?"

"Just trying to stay away from your ugly face as long as I can!" Ruff yelled back. She looked back at the boy still in front of her and opened her mouth. It closed and opened like that a few more times, 'till finally she sighed and muttered, "I'll see you later." She headed towards the door.

Astrid and Hiccup, who were on looking this entire scene, gestured there hands over at Ruffnut, insisting Fishlegs don't let her go just yet.

He ran in front of her, blocking her way to the door. "Hey, listen," He began, obvious nervousness choking in his throat. "I managed to catch one of those fights you and Tuff have with your Zippleback's heads, the other day." He kicked at the ground and forced his eyes upward. He was surprised to see her looking back. "I've got a little secret that could increase your chances of winning?"

Ruff raised an eyebrow at him.

"Not that I'm implying that you _need_ help winning," He rambled, bringing sweat back to his forehead. "But," He shrugged. "It could be useful."

Ruffnut peeked over Fishlegs shoulder; outside the door. After deciding that no harm could possibly come to her if she talked to him a few minutes longer, she mustered up enough of her attention towards him as she could. "Alright, let's hear it."

"R-really?" He stuttered. "Okay, w-well...see, I was reading up on the Hideous Zippleback and, well...I found out that _your_ particular dragon head; you know, the one that breathes the gas?"

"Gasleak," Ruffnut answered.

"Right, well, if he brings himself to be just three quarters of a foot taller than Tuffnut's dragon, the spark shooting head...?" Fishlegs stopped, offering a moment for the girl viking to state its name.

"Like it matters," She said, brushing away the brief pause. "Go on." She beckoned, surprised that she was actually listening to all of this.

"Okay, well...if Gasleak breaths gas into the other dragon's eyes at that exact angle, he can temporarily blind that dragon head long enough to strike. It also disallows _that _head to create a spark," He finished. "It's one of the creature's weaknesses."

Ruffnut clapped her hands, smiling wide. "That's awesome! Who knew reading could actually teach you stuff?"

Fishlegs laughed along with her, rubbing the back of his neck. "Ha, yeah."

"Wait," She paused and glared him down. "You didn't tell my beef brain brother this, right? Or another trick that might help _him_ win?"

"What?" He shook his head. "N-no, of course not."

"Cool," Her smile returned and Fishlegs thought he might melt into a puddle below their feet. Then there was an awkward silence between the two.

"So, I was just about to get some lunch and I was wondering if you might-"

A large sound echoed through the shop, cutting off Ruff's current sentence. Hiccup, giving up on trying to retrieve the hammer that had fallen to the ground, froze when her eyes landed on him and Astrid.

"I'm sorry, can we help you guys with something?" She asked the couple.

"Us?" The young blacksmith coughed. "No, we were just-"

"Eavesdropping on our conversation?"

"Well, not exactly," He chuckled, uncomfortably.

"Hey, we were here first!" Astrid spoke up defensively.

"Tell you what," Ruffnut said, turning her back on Fishlegs, so she was now completely facing Hiccup and Astrid. "Why don't you two do us all a favor and go...make out or something."

The brunette paused and looked at his girlfriend with teasing, but also willing eyes. She shook her head, smirking; and punched him in the arm. But, not wanting to disturb them any longer, zipped out the back door with Hiccup close behind.

The girl twin scowled after them, then brought her attention back to Fishlegs, who was busy trying not to sweat out of nervousness again. "So, what were we talking about?"

The boy blinked. "Oh, uhm...I-"

"Right," She interrupted. "Lunch. I was just about to get some. Wanna come along?"

He forced his head to nod.

"Great!" Another smile formed on her lips and she grabbed Fishlegs by the wrist, dragging him outside. Halfway, Tuffnut caught up to them.

"Thanks for finally showing up," He grumbled at his sister. Then his eyes focused on the viking she had in tow. "Hey, Fishy!" He patted his friend's back, causing Ruff to let go of his wrist and take the lead, while the two guys trailed behind.

Fishlegs smiled in reply.

"It's about time my sister asked you out," Tuff said, leaning on him. "I was getting tired of "accidentally" throwing axe's your way."

"Wha-"

But before Tuffnut had a chance to answer-or Fishlegs had a chance to finish-Ruffnut threw him a right hook, knocking her brother down.

She sneered at the ground and quickly shot up, sporting that same smile. "Shall we?"

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**Also, to add: I don't actually know if the gas breathing head of the Zippleback was actually Ruffnut's, but in my story it is, lol. Comments are love! :D**


End file.
